Although it’s been almost 10 years since Eddie Levert lost his son/singer, Gerald, and almost 8 years since he lost his son/singer, Sean, R&B fans across the world are still saddened behind their deaths, so you can probably imagine the amount of grief and pain, their father and mother still go through to this day.

After Gerald passed away in November of 2006 from an accidental overdose of prescription meds and over-the-counter meds, everyone was wondering how Eddie, who was extremely close to his son, would be able to go on. But 14 months later in March of 2008, the unthinkable happened when Sean died from withdrawals from the anxiety med, Xanax, while in police custody for non-payments of child support. After that, friends and fans alike became even more concerned how Eddie and his ex-wife, Martha, (Sean and Gerald’s Mom) would be able to keep on keeping on.
A few years ago Eddie opened up to The Plain Dealer and Ebony about how he’s been coping with the Gerald and Sean’s death. He also manned up and willingly admitted where he feels he went wrong at as a father to Sean and Gerald. Here are excerpts from those interviews:

On his sons’ untimely deaths:

“If it wasn’t supposed to be, it wouldn’t have happened. I wish I could tell you that I had a sense of why, but I don’t. I still wonder: Was it something I did?”

“Maybe that’s why I’ve made so many changes in my life, to better myself and try to be a better father, a better husband, a better friend. Maybe that’s the reason why: for me to come to a better place.

“But I can’t dwell on it. It becomes very emotional for me. It gets to a place where . . .”

His voice cracked and trailed off. A long pause. Taking a deep breath, he finished his thought:

“I really miss them. It’s just hard. But I can’t get caught up in the fact that it wasn’t supposed to be like this, because it happened.

“And there was nothing I could do about it.” -The PlainDealer

Co-founder and member of The O’Jays, Walter Williams, explains changes he saw in Eddie after Gerald and Sean’s deaths:

“Eddie told me that he had to get back to work, to take all of that off his mind. I thought it was too soon. But he said he needed to do something. So we went back to work. I could see him at times in the dressing room, staring off way into wherever he was. He wasn’t really himself.

Before we could put a cap on that — and I knew Eddie never could, because he told me that it left a hole in his heart that would never heal — Sean left us. That really destroyed him.” [TPD]

After Sean’s death, Eddie told Walter “I can’t do this anymore. This business has taken a toll on me and my family,” so Walter encouraged him to take break to grieve.

During his process of grieving and healing from losing two sons, Eddie credits his wife, Raquel, and his faith in God and religion with helping him to cope with his heartache:

On his wife: “She’s so intelligent, so humane, so in touch with God. Her stability helped me get through all of that. She’s been a rock for me, a real live crutch I can lean on. She helps keep me focused. She says that I still have a purpose here, that I still have things that I have to do.”

On his faith: “I’m no holy roller by any means. But I believe. There are only two kinds of people in the world: the believer and the nonbeliever. I happen to be a believer.

“I read the Book of Job. He lost everything. I didn’t lose everything. I lost two sons. It’s not trivial. But compared to somebody who lost their whole family — do you understand? — I was left something. God is still great. I kept praying to God, and God kept giving me strength. I had days when I blubbered like a baby, just crying. I still have those moments. But I have a purpose now.” [TPD]

The music and memories Eddie has of performing with his sons, are what ultimately get him through day by day:

“The music has always been healing. With Gerald and Sean, the times we had together onstage are some of the greatest moments of my life, man. The times that I was onstage with them doing ‘Casanova’ or ‘Baby Hold on to Me’ or ‘Wind Beneath My Wings’ — to me, those are priceless.

“Even now, when I go and perform those songs by myself, they’re medicine. The most therapeutic time I have in my whole life is that hour and a half that I do onstage. Because for an hour and a half, I don’t think about nothing but the music. Don’t think about the pain in my knees. Don’t think about the pain in my back. Don’t think about how I feel bad. All of that goes away as soon as I start doing that music.” [TPD]

Although Eddie spoke to his sons everyday and told them he loved them all the time, he still has deep regrets of not being the best father to his sons that he thought he should have been:

“When Gerald and Sean passed away, I wanted to really blame myself because I felt like it was some things I could’ve kept them from seeing that I did in my life, as a father. You know what I’m saying? People say, ‘You’re a great dad,’ and all of that, but I’m a person, too, you know?

I used to take them on the road with me, because it was my wife’s chance to get her break. I’d take the kids for the summer and she’d be able to get off into her ministry as being one of Jehovah’s witnesses. She was a great woman; she just had a rotten man. You know? And I can speak of that guy as being a rotten man because he didn’t know what he had and he didn’t know who he was or what he should’ve been doing. It was ignorance. I had to learn.

And so, consequently, they saw me do some things that … I thought they should’ve been in bed, but the person that was taking care of them, they was out partying so they was out partying and they saw me out partying. That’s how it works.” [Ebony]

How Gerald and Sean’s death were wake-up calls for Eddie to be a better father to his youngest child- his 13 year old daughter:

“Now I make time to go to the school programs, the school outings, the graduations,” Levert said.

“I try to be there on those special days. . . . With Gerald and Sean, I didn’t go, because I was always on the road.

“Playing. Going to the park. Cooking breakfast. Those little things right there are so very important.

“This is what you need to be doing with your children. You don’t need nobody outside of you to be their role model. You need to be their role model. That’s what I’ve been working on. That’s how Gerald and Sean made me better.” [TPD]

Eddie’s advice to parents who are still blessed to have their children here with them:

“Spend time with those kids. At the end of the day, if something happens to them, you’re going to hurt. But you won’t have regret.”

“I’m still grieving. I don’t think I’m ever going to get past that. I wake up some mornings and I would love just to talk to them, to reach over and pick up the phone. The only thing I can tell you is that those boys knew that I loved them, ’cause I told them every day. We talked every day. They knew that I loved them.”

Sean and Gerald have unfortunately transitioned on, but they have left their father with one of the greatest gifts anyone could ask for- the gift of wisdom. Although we wish they were still here, the lessons they’ve given Eddie are beautiful, because now with his younger kids and his grandchildren, he has a chance to try to get it right in honor of his beloved sons. We hope that Eddie; Sean’s and Gerald’s mother, Martha; and their children continue to find ways to properly cope with their extreme heartache.

Source 1, Source 2